No Surprises Living In Devizes: Have a lie-in if you want but don’t say there’s nowt to do!

Darren Worrow takes the brunt of a sponge at The Cavalier fun day


“NOTHING ever happens in Devizes.” Record stuck again, how many times must we endure this tedious drone?

Someone posted their observation of fireworks on the Devizes Issue Facebook page, from the direction of Calne. Another screamed, “hide your pets!” A reply speculated it’s Melksham, our madcap raving neighbours with their Party in the Park; how dare they.

Meanwhile, a lady reported the sighting of “a large brown rat eating something dropped on the pavement,” on London Road. Let the Sham party, we’ve other worthy pursuits (proficient facepalm.)

Wiltshire Museum cancelled a zine making workshop this week due to lack of interest. Not exactly the Notting Hill Carnival, but it highlights an issue; our lethargic attitude towards getting involved can be valued, provided we don’t ironically dribble that there’s nothing to do in this town.

Thus, my rant commences, (an ab-lib rant I might add, the subject for this week being abandoned last second.) I’m not excluding myself from the guilt; I see events listed on Facebook and think “yeah, that’s got me written all over it.” Then, when my phone pings its reminder my head barely rises from the pillow.

Last weekend beautiful music was reported rising from the rugby club as the superbly organised Saddleback Blues Festival, got under way.

Supporting Julia’s House and Care-If, this was the first extravaganza of its kind, with a staggering line-up including, Jo Harman and The Boom Band, The Red-Hot Trio, The Lightnin’ Hobos, Poplar Jake and Lisa Mills. But upon noting the photos posted online, seems it was rather threadbare and slight of crowds.

The Gazette reported it attracted around 500 people, hats off to the organisers who were pleased with the turnout, still our town’s population is 32,090, excluding the killions (that’s a zillion zillions) of villages surrounding it.

While it was a marvellous occasion, a quality idea, and I acknowledge its high price tag in a time when cash is everything, (these events take a truckload of organisation) but it must be said a greater effort to celebrate all that’s good about Devizes gets swamped by criticisms there’s nought to do, when clearly there is; we all need to rally and be supportive.

Meanwhile on the other side of town the Devizes Scooter Club held a family fun day at The Cavalier, trilbies-off to all involved there too, the event was hailed a success raising over £700 for the Devizes & District Opportunity Centre, with activities for kids, barbecue, side stalls and raffle it rocked to the sounds of local Easily Led, who, like the Devizes Scooter Club members, gave up their time freely, and wow, who was that awesome DJ?

Easily Led in action at The Cavalier

Okay yeah, blush; ’twas I! My adventures on the wheels of steel the reason why I didn’t get a column down last weekend and nothing about being put off by criticisms over the Claire Perry interview by one spoiled brat, thinking she’s Devizes answer to Katie Hopkins!

Sorry, off on a tangent there, where was I? (ad-lib remember)… out-of-towners swamped the Cavi’s car-park with scooters but again, same point made, we could have had more local bods on the scene.

Last night the Conservative Club raised a further 500 smackers for the Opportunity Centre with a quiz night – things are happening all the time folks.

Times Square have singer/songwriter Ben Cippolla on Friday and a Caribbean Night on the 28th, kids have Camp Extra over the holidays and the MACs is opening a Mini-Macs for six to 10-year olds.

The Farm Cookery School at Netherstreet have Italian cooking holiday club for 11+, the ever-hilarious Moonrakers Comedy Club presents a Comedy Race-Off at the Bear on Wednesday, Devizes Folk Club give us The Crofton Stokers on 24th and well, I’d wager there’s more to add I don’t know about, (if you let me know of your events I will mention them and not even demand that you let me DJ! I tell you, I was like Smashie and Nicey rolled into one; you ain’t seen nothing yet baby.)

So, what are we scared of, changeable weather? Have you seen that festival at Pamplona in Spain where someone thought it’d be amusing to allow rampant wild bulls to run around the street and spike people’s bums? People still attend in their thousands.

A lie-in is justifiable but don’t let me hear your tedious “Nothing ever happens in Devizes,” codswallop again, I’d rather talk to the excellent flowerpot people who’ve conquered our roundabouts, they’ve far more life in them than you. Cue Bachman Turner Overdrive; I’ve said my piece, Worrow out!

DARREN WORROW

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